Resuming where I left

It's start of 2018.
I have come a long way in life.
Been more than 10 years since I started this blog.
I realised how useful my blog can be for me in journaling my days and events.
I wish to resume where and what I left.

We had an awesome 31st Dec night party last night in society.
Daksh and Neelu both enjoyed in musical chairs and I joined the fun when we played lotto game.
I hated the food that the organisers had arranged. It was cheap.
More so because I paid good bucks for it.
Met some good people in society who up till now were completely strangers to me.
It's good and important to socialise a bit.
Helps being approachable and hence being more aware and connected.
Tonight we went for a super good movie Jumanji.
I loved the movie.
Daksh was even more elated than me to be watching it.
He didn't know that more than 20 years ago even his father got super excited when he watched the prequel.
I learned something in it.
We have actually one life always. Living it with confidence and common sense is super important.
I am going to start being more organised and structured.
Soaring Eagles is coming across as a big help.
Let's see.

Masaan: Movie Review

Fly Away Solo.....

That's the name of the english version of the movie that I am going to write about today, Masaan.

Life becomes worthy of living when you come across movies like Masaan.

Masaan is an apbhramsha (twisted due to local dialect) of Sanskrit word Shmashaan i.e. A Hindu Crematorium. The movie revolves around two blooming, meandering, struggling and eventually dying love stories around river Ganga, City of Banaras and burning pyres on banks of river Ganga. Surprisingly, in spite of the dark and sad mood during most part of the movie, the movie has a super hopeful climax where the two love stories appear to be merging. This would create a strange happy anxiety in hearts of movie-viewers. 

Sincerely, I felt thankful to the director, writer and actors of the movie for giving me a long awaited experience. 

It deserves the best appreciation possible because not only this movie makes your heart do a roller coaster ride of emotions, but also it's a debut movie of director Neeraj Ghaywan, writer Varun Grover and then so many main actors like Vicky Kaushal and  Shweta Tripathi.

Cast: Richa Chadha, Sanjay Mishra, Vicky Kaushal, Shweta Tripathi, Pankaj Tripathi.

Plot: Movie starts with Devi (Richa Chadha) disguising as a married lady and walking into a cheap hotel room with a fellow student Piyush for a desperate sex session only to get caught by local police midway during the hot romp session. Frightened by the risk of public shame, Piyush commits suicide and dies.

Starts a murky phase of blackmailing by police inspector Mishra where he asks father of Devi, Vidyadhar Pathak ji (Sanjay Mishra), to pay a bribe of 3 lakh rupees in lieu of shutting down the case.

Pathak ji is not a man who can source that kind of money right away due to his righteous ways of living and most of the movie shows him struggling to earn and collect this money through all possible means that he dreaded and hated in past.

Devi keeps shuttling and hopping from jobs to jobs in hope of finding a decent place to work and trying to forget Piyush. 

In parallel is running another story of Shalu and Deepak in the same city of Banaras.

Deepak is young promising son of a local "Dom" family who are part of this ancient community who assist in burning of dead bodies on the banks of Ganga. Though he is deep into his family vocation of assisting in burning pyres and breaking skulls using sticks, he yearns to free himself and fly away into a more socially respectable job. He is shown to be a career oriented, forward looking and  instinctive guy. Comes in a bubbly and vivacious girl Shalu who steals away Deepak's heart. Starts a beautiful part of the movie. They keep advancing on the journey of love where they even talk of eloping away as socially they would not be allowed to marry due to their caste differences.

But destiny had something else in store.

Shalu dies in an accident and Deepak realises about it only when her dead body is brought to him while he is busy in his daily duty of burning dead bodies. He recognises her body through the ring which she used to wear. This part of movie stuns as no one could expect the crude twist of death shaking up all kind of stories that a normal Indian movie goer would start romantically cooking up. Stunned me big time indeed.

Movie moves on. Deepak falls into a deep vicious loop of remorse, holding onto Shalu's last souvenir, her ring.

The movie seems to be going into never ending sad depressing events, one after another.

But then as climax approaches the movie suddenly shifts the emotional gears and things start falling into their logical slots, and for a change, the depression vaporises away.

Pathak Ji pays off the money fleecing blackmailing Inspector Mishra. Devi settles peace with Piyush family by personally explaining herself to them and lands up a stable job in Allahabad, away from her hometown and father. On similar lines, even Deepak secures a stable govt job and that too in city of Allahabad. The two stories seemingly and symbolically confluence while both of them are traversing the confluence of three rivers, Sangam, the major tourist spot of of the city of Allahabad. 

High Points:

1. The "moral" police barging into privacy of Devi and Piyush leading to Piyush' suicide.

2. Pathak ji being blackmailed by police.

3. Deepak and Shalu courting and chatting on phone where she recites beautiful poems to him while He admits that he doesn't know any of those poets and their works

4. Deepak informing Shalu of his family background

5. Shalu's death and Deepak's long drawn mourning and dark remorse

6. Pathak ji running to hospital with near dead Jhonta, a kid who used to assist him in his shop and his struggle to earn the urgent money

7. The two protagonists meeting at sangam out of strange destiny

Overall: The movie is meant for discerning movie-goers and not for the average latka jhatka seeking Sooraj Barjatya, Karan Johar and Chutzpah band of "Khan"dom lovers. It hits you deep in the belly and makes it twitch with pain. You won't breath easy till long and till you decide to take out the best story ahead in your own mind. 

Watch it for kick-ass story, smartly edited screenplay, simple yet thought provoking dialogues, nuanced yet deeply convincing small town love stories, real feel acting, soothing and well weaved music, awesome lyrics and then some bright new talented faces working with some tenured experts.

Watch it while you are relaxing at home with a good quality single malt mixed with ice n water, stirred ;-)

My Rating - 4.5* 

Have fun ! Chalaa Taani !

Neo.

The Calling !

Recently I created a new folder in my laptop. The name is "Dream of my Life".
Well, at least as of today, I feel that the contents would drive me to achieve the dream of my life. Both are assumptions.
One that the contents (current as well as future) would enable me to achieve my dream. And two that the so called dream is my real calling.
I am kind of afraid of assuming.
It's like creating stories in your head.
At times, we just start with some facts, build up assumptions/stories and then conclude/decide to make a reality/possibility take birth in our present that from that point onwards, alters our lives.
One of my Italian Commandante taught me this lesson in life - End of the day, To ASSUME is to make an ASS of U and ME.
But then, we all are victims of desire. We tend to assume unknowingly, like an involuntary reflex action. That's like a shortcut to analyse situations, thoughts and ideas. We all tend to shy away from a deep analysis on everything. Should we do that, even ?
A statistics professor once told me - Analysis, analysis, analysis ..... Paralysis.
Imagine ! Statisitcs ? Professor ? Yeah !
To dive out of a potent paralysis, I decided to go ahead and take the leap.
I have been doing that in life.
I am actually result of various leaps of faith. We can't predict everyhting in life. It's better to act rather than wait for eternity to fall on our head and show a path.
At times, we should just go by the flow. It helps.
It helps in many ways.
Ways like,making you ready for times to come. Ways like,putting you ahead of the curve.
Times can change, and so do people. Curves can be nice, lethal and at times, educating.

Life is taken in two ways ... as per my reading.
One i the short term life. You take care of daily shit.
Two is the long term life. You take care of the real shit.
Both are important. Without one, the other is useless.
This balancing of both terms if the discovery of life,it seems. And we all mortals, in this life, should be doing that.
Your life, your call. My life, my call :-)

So what's my dream? Even if you are not, I am curious to explore and No points for guessing.
I am doing it right now.
Writing, indeed :-)

May be it'd take years. But seems to me that it's my calling.

I am indeed excited to find this exciting :-)

Have fun !
Neo.

Ugly: Movie Review

One who laughs last, laughs the best.
What a movie to close 2014 with !
Ugly, as a movie, is beautiful ... Yes.
But how "you" perceive it, would heavily depend on your definition of "beauty" in cinema.

Plot:
A complicated one, to start with :-)
Shalini ( Tejaswini) is a divorced woman and mother to 8-9 year old girl, Kali. Both of them live with Shalini's 2nd husband, Shaumik (Ronit), who also happens to be a ruthless and experienced cop in Mumbai Police. Shalini's 1st husband (a struggling actor in Mumbai), Rahul (Rahul Bhat) comes to take Kali for a routine break on a random saturday (weekend) as per their child custody agreement. Kali hops in her papa Rahul's car and Rahul drives away from Shalini and Shaumik's home. Kali waits for him in the car when he goes to his film-producer friend Chaitanya (Vineet Singh) to discuss an upcoming movie script. Sometime later, Rahul, alerted by Vineet, realises that Kali is missing from the car. From this point onwards the movie is all about Rahul n Shaumik's hunt for their daughter (Kali). Sadly, this hunt turns real ugly with various look-and-feel-good people jumping in but with ill-intent. And hence, we realise why Anurag chose this name for the flick.

Strengths: Director, Thrilling Script, Twists and Surprises, Dialogues and Acting, Power-performances - especially Vineet (Chaitanya), Rahul and Ronit (Shaumik). This movie is made out of several never-seen faces who actually create magic on screen with their real-in-your-face presence and dialogue deliveries like Inspector Jadhav, Lady ACP, Husband of Surveen Chawla and Aunt of the Kidnapper. Anurag is definitely a master recruiter. Also, don't miss Shakti Kapoor's son Siddhant's papa-like-jig.

Weaknesses: May appear too dark and too real for some people to digest. Contains some gory scenes and dialogues filled with expletives.

Movie is 10 times better than PK (which is streaming parallely in theaters) yet without any backing of promotional efforts. Given another fact that it's an "Only for Adults" movie, I am pretty sure that the only thing that can help this movie receive its due worth is a viral-marketing / word-of-mouth publicity.

Overall: One word - Awesome, One Phrase - Don't miss it !

Stars: 4*

Cheers,
Neo.

PK: Movie Review

Raju Hirani has done 3 movies before PK and by this time I am confident that I would be able to make out even his 100th movie out of a heap of unlabelled DVDs. He has a signature style of movie making and he does a very good job at that. Else, who would have remembered a not so conspicuous person who used to come in small TV Ads and jingles like Fevicol in 90s.

Plot:
PK is an alien who lands in Terminator style near a barren railway track in Rajasthan and he gets robbed off the remote control which was only way for him to get back to his planet. The entire movie is interspersed with his bouts of struggle to get back his remote from humans. Against all odds, Hirani's movie would always delve into an issue which would question status quo and challenge the system. Here in PK he has very smartly pushed in a satire on religion filled with incidental light humor and emotion-filled plot.
Anushka Sharma (Jaggu) is a repoter who helps PK get his remote back. Saurabh Shukla (Tapaswi Ji) is a godman whom PK confronts for his remote with simple yet powerful questions which make people wonder the veracity of the divisive religious faiths we have.

Strengths: Song- Chaar Kadam, Humor, Aamir, Anushka, Raju Hirani, Ranbir's guest entry, Wrong Number wala slogan - I am sure it will go viral

Weaknesses: Story (somehow hackneyed and unrealistic), Bhojpuri (I may be biased but plz don't distort a language so much), Charachter of Parikshit Sahni (father of Anushka. Who whistles at one's daughter's book recital ?? Overacting jerk !), Bomb-Blast was not needed to balance the tone, please and Dilliwaale

Overall: I liked the movie but not as much as I liked Raju's previous 3 movies.
Why ?
Well ... you see ...At one point Anushka's charachter even admits Hirani's intent behind PK, that people love to see something new all the time. Hirani seems to have assumed that the script of the PK would be taken as quite hat-ke but actually PK sounds so much like Akshay and Paresh Rawal starrer "OMG" ! On few occassions I felt irritated actually when I felt like watching OMG-2 !

Having said that - still Hirani saves his day by not overdoing the plot into details and tries to keep the issue-discussion bundled with humor and balances his challenges on one particular religion (i.e. Hinduism) by mixing other religions too. But somehow I felt, why being so defensive and explanatory ? A very controversial question that I wanted to ask Hirani was - why we Hindus (or Indians) feel afraid in making a satire biased while questioning even Islam ? Why we feel it's Ok to question Hinduism ? Just because it's a cultured behaviour to make fun of one's own community as that would not hurt others' sentiments ? Somehow I could feel the defensive as well as lopsided tone in the script.

So - One time watchable only ... and nowhere near MunnaBhai or Rancho ...

Stars: 3*

Chalaa Taani !
Neo.

Karma = Bitch

As they say - Karma is a bitch ! She loves 69 because you get what you give 😜

You would wonder what made me say this ... Well ... recently I realised power of this bitch in its full bloom. 

Some backdrop to give you a perspective - My faith in myself is a strong one. I indeed started shaping myself up somewhere around 57th anniversary of Hiroshima and Nagasaki bombing ... Strange ? Hehehe ... Nothing much but I picked up a book by Burke Hedges which talked about some tried and tested tips for success and happiness. One of the points that I remember out of that entire cellulose bundle is that we all are broadly results of our own actions and that taking responsibility of one's own actions and thoughts is a mandatory key to a successful life ...

Since then I started becoming more of what you know me as now and what I will become in future ...

But I was one person who realised power of thoughts, speeches and actions quite early in life ... Lucky me ...

Flash forward - The lightning struck when I was recently reminded that not everyone in this mrityu-lok is blessed with that kind of mind. There are people who love blaming others for their own problems ... I even went on to discover the intricate fabric / matrix of karma around our lives ... Which at times gets interspersed with others' Karma too ...

What people give you is their Karma but the way you respond back, is your Karma. So watch out ...

And thus, come what may, I'm not going to deter from my duties and the due Karma that I have to release in this metaphysical space within the time slot assigned to me out of eternity ... 

I am developing a taste for spiritualism and faith in a person whom I have been ignoring for long ... The God ... 

I can feel its presence in and around me ... Again ... And I feel strange ... It's like everything started coming back to me ... Again ... I even did a few days of research on the life beyond death ... Realised there has been no empirical evidence of a soul moving out of body and taking birth again into some different body in next life ... Scientists term the so-called soul as a manifestation of our very own neurons and some electrical pulses running through them ... and that when people describe the strange light that they saw during near death experiences are actually just hallucinations caused just when their brains were near complete brain death ... So we humans have somehow agreed that we are alone in this whole universe ? That would be an awful waste of space indeed 😜 ... Bullshit !

 

Not convinced .. Me .. You mini me's scientists ...

We are indeed manifestations of someone else sitting somewhere else doing something else ... Had that energy been so vulnerable to let us know all tools and concepts to decipher its own existence, we humans would have been impatient enough to have stained that citadel too ... Something's are better kept secret ... And then something's are better when told ... That Karma is a bitch ... Hence Proved. Now FO !

Love.

Chala Taani !

Neo 😜

Haider : Movie Review

Gulon mein rang bhare ...

Baad-e-naubahar chale ...

Chale bhi aao ...

Ke Gulshan ka Karobaar Chale ... 

Haider has a soul ... Somewhere Menhdi Hasan and Faiz would be smiling along with Shakespeare.

Cast: Shahid (Haider), Tabu (Ghazala), Kay Kay (Khurram), Shraddha (Arshiya), Irrfan (Roohdaar), Narendra Jha (Dr. Hilaal).

Plot: Set in 1995 Kashmir, this "Hamlet" inspired movie is about revenge of Haider, whose father went missing after a BSF raid on their home. Haider's mom, Ghazala, happens to be his uncle Khurram's secret desire. Arshiya is the lady love of Haider. The movie in fact starts when Haider's father Dr. Hilaal Meer gets caught with a terrorist inside his home and goes missing (BSF is shown in negative/neutral light in this movie, so chill). Haider arrives home in Kashmir from his college in Aligarh, finds his home burnt and that his mom and uncle are not so sad about it all.  He starts searching for his missing father alone meandering through the mazes of indifferent system of state administration, police and BSF. In cometh Roohdaar a former ISI agent and current Jihadi who claims that he was with Haider's father till his last moment  and that his father was caught due to a deceitful trigger pulled by  his uncle Khurram. Rooh also claims that Ghazala was an accomplice in Khurram's plan.  The plot thickens. Haider cries "revenge".

The movie moves into a bit of long drawn twists till the time you reach climax. Not sharing the entire plot so as to maintain reader's curiosity.

Highs: You feel the emotional crescendo rising at 

1. Bulbul-e-Bismil song and awesome dance by Shahid,

2. "Mike Check" act of Haider, 

3. the graveyard song, 

4. when you hear Dr. Hilaal singing Menhdi Hasan's "karobar chale" in BSF captivity and 

5. when Ghazala takes everyone in audience to climax of movie just by pulling one string.

Lows: None whatsoever. I was glued to screen and could never feel even a single low.

Strengths: Script, Dialogues, Cast, Kashmir, Music, Lyrics, Acting ... What else do you need ?

After long time we have seen such a masterpiece on screen created. Thanks to the script from VB and Basharrat Peer.

Shahid, Tabu, Kay Kay steal the show with their power packed roles as well as flawless acting. 2 thumbs up to the dialogues especially to the one which Roohdaar replies to Dr. Hilaal when he was asked as to wether Roohdaar is a Shia or a Sunni. Signature of VB, Music is just awesome with soulful lyrics from Gulzaar and Faiz Sahab. The movie claims that how seamless the shoot went when credits start rolling ... what could have been a better place to shoot a movie than Kashmir. 

Weaknesses: Arshiya's fate, Long drawn twists at times ...

Overall: Haider is not something that you think of. In my knowledge this is the most balanced yet bold flick about the political issue known as Kashmir. It doesn't bend itself towards or away from any side. The "mike check" act by Haider is actually the punch / rhetoric in face of everyone in political brass as to what is solution of Kashmir ? Many of us Indians won't be able to relate to what's shown because for us normal Indians, days and nights are relatively predictable and peaceful. Before anything, we are humans. Vishal Bhardwaj has deep dived into details of the issue and has been very bold in expressing it with his heart. This movie should rather be made tax free and should also contest for Oscars. 

Watch it for Kashmir and the best till date from VB. Kids and faint heated should avoid as there are some gory scenes.

My Ratings: 4.5*

"We would run through those streets again - II"

Heer
====
Still wondering as to what happened to her life ? For the world, she is happy, smug and contented. But inside, deep inside, is she sure of what she is concluding about her life ?
She misses Rancho, but not always. She has moved on. She is firm on that. No one can deter her thoughts now.
Rancho was a mistake. Gross one ...
=======================
Rancho
======
Still wondering as to what happened to his life ? For the world, he is happy, smug and contented. But inside, deep inside, is he sure of what he is concluding about his life ?
He misses Heer, always. Has he moved on? He is unable to be firm on that. Thoughts ? Don't ask .....
Heer was the most beautiful thing ever happened to Rancho ...

But Rancho should move on ...

He has been confused with what struck his life. At first he thought he was in love. Well, can someone define love for him ?
I don't think so. People have been conditioned that love has to happen the way movies show it.
Why would we press Rancho to accept a definition which doesn't have any firm footing of its own ?

Every sane human has a split personality (don't mistake it with the psychopath's split personality) ...
There's a person A and then there's even a person B inside a human.
Person A is what that person is perceived by outer world - be it his/her family members, friends and even the spouse.
Person A is the nice, social, logical, responsible, lovable, respectable and ambitious picture of that human.

On the other hand, the Person B is what is known to only the innermost core of the human mind. Just at a level in between the subconscious and conscious minds. This person is unsophisticated, unsocal, illogical, irresponsible, despicable for the world and smug on ambitions. In spite of all these vices, this Person B is capable to attract the most beautiful thing on this earth - and that's called as "Unconditional Love" ... Unfortunately, Person B's desires at best, if exposed in society, would hint at blasphemy or perversion ... But that's a definition made by humans who choked their Person Bs to death.

Rancho may have got into this unconditional love with Heer ... That's why his B has not been able to forget Heer ... Heer felt similar rush of emotions too ... But she didn't hope for an unconditional bond ...
Today ... She misses Rancho ... and then very next moment, she moves on. She is firm on that.

Now, Rancho never expects Heer to come back in his life but he still hopes for it ...

=====================================
Heer and Rancho - And their story :-)

Just trying my hand on developing a coherent flow of thoughts ... suggestions welcome ...

Manga Tak !

Neo.

Bounce Back, Kill and Move On

Life is a long duration school. We keep learning every day. If we have to maintain our balance, be it mental or emotional or physical, we need to keep moving on.

I had been sidelined, shunted, deceived, ridiculed and even back-stabbed badly by those whom I gave my blood, sweat and even heart. Too naive you bugger ... take it ... now you better improve ...

There were instances in my past when I literally went near life changing nervous breakdowns ...
Some opportunists even thought of using my situational disadvantage. Rest everyone around me thought I sounded fine. Much because I didn't share my inner struggle as I didn't like unsolicited advice.
But deep inside me - I was demanding for justice ... From whom ? Well, I lost faith in your God long ago ...
I was lost, battered, tired, and disillusioned. I didn't like sharing my stress and would have ended up falling into depression.
At times I have been facing challenges on my limitations too ... I had and have many of them ... But I decided to defy them ... People have tried to put a tag on me ... I firmly believe that if I am humble enough to understand my gaps and if I have a reason good enough for the effort, I can change myself ... And I mean it ...

They say, "Neo bounce-back zordaar maarta hai" ... I don't actually like sulking and acting like a tragedy queen for long ... I have got one life here ... Can't waste it for some losers whom I loved or trusted more than they deserved ...
Also, if Neo needs to mend ways, so be it ... I am "The One" .... The child in me would bounce back without any initiation and that's my mantra ... 1st step is to pick up the right springs to fit beneath my sole and then 2nd step is to prepare for the bounce-back-and-kill-bill ... I just refuse to give-up or keep falling into traps ...

What turned me around on each occassion was always something people would ignore in daily rigmarole of life ...

Now comes the agenda of this post - Remembering my turn-around cues in my blog here now so that in future, I can know now how and where I would get those springs :D

a. Chaailaa kya surat thi vo kya kehte hain ... Vo raat apun do baje tak piyaaaaa ... bhoolna hai bhoolna hai ... agle din mohalle mein --- Aishwarya aayi ;-)
b. If you can get what you want in life just by sheer hard work, then what's stopping you from doing that ? Just go ahead and start hitting the hammer :-)
c. Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies .... ;-)
d. A hard fall means a high bounce... if you're made of the right material ... :D
e. I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom ... (somehow I am a big fan of bouncing back concept ... may be this why I keep falling rock bottom ... Kick , eh ? ;-))

Chalaa Taani !!
Love - Neo.

Music is language of souls : Me trying to interact today :D

I keep falling into this weird quicksand of narcissism ... And the best part is that over passing years I realised that I am not the greatest hero born on this earth ... and then these instances of getting entrapped actually started giving me pain ...

Today I am writing direct from heart .... So beware of making any conclusions :D ... as I have a damn strong brain and will to control my heart ... So what you see here is not my perceived self ... but what I am actually deep within ... as in Inside-Out (there goes Bryan Adams crooning his heart out)

I don't like society. I rather hate it. Why ? Because it has always kept my inner thoughts and wishes at leash ... Abhinav unleashed would be much more unsocial, a near-psychopath, a selfish, a quick-fun-acquiring yet an outwardly-humble guy with a sinister smile ... Devil Incarnate :D

Society has always kept killing something inside me ... this why I started hating the very source of this civilization and rules based living ... your so called fucked up concept of God !

I didn't like when I was rated ... against some people who were directionless ...
I actually liked some fellow human beings as they were really beautiful ... enough so that I would hanker for them ... But then I kept moving on ... even one single hint of indifference from them sent me into a state of reflective indifference ... actually narcissism ... yet again ... And then I started telling myself - They are losers ... They don't kow whom they are missing out ... :D

Rest all people went to take oil ... I am what I am and I will be always me ... !

Then came my academy ... my turning yard ... a long turning on lathe and subsequent metamorphosis ... On 5th October 1999 the entire hostel danced on some random music medley and wished me a happy and long life ... I had never been center of attention for such a large crowd ... that night changed me forever ... I realised the strength in me as a soul ... realized that actually I was the winner at birth itself ... afterall I was the fastest sperm out of millions who wished to fuse the ovum first ... I started loving myself more ... It can actually whack your entire psyche ... It did to mine at least ...

And then the ships and the beauitful oceans ... I fell in love with them the moment I saw them for the first time ... they were just so grand ... like a sublime magnum opus with all possible epic sequences, dialogues and moments ...

But all this while ... I kept my animal instinct intact ... deep somewhere ... though by now buried away from this indurate and (rather) blood-seeking society ... only unleashing it in flashes for my selfish yet humble growth trajectory ... While I moved into a desired state of emotional bonding ... Which initially came across as a covalent one ... which later ... only due to this society - turned into a real ionic one :-) I tend to ignore follies made here (My circus ... my monkeys) ...

By that time, guided solely by worldly desires of fulfillment, I kept running ... only until I realzed my animal started turning impatiently in its own grave when it heard some faint murmur of like-minded souls above the hard lid I had put over it ...

Now ... when I am already engrossed into this mad rat race ... one day ... just like that I asked my animal ... would it plan to come up again ?

It said - "No ... You have been running fine ... You may actually go on to be a winner in this rat race"

"But ... Would that bring me happiness ?"

"Who knows, Abhinav ? ... Would you see your actions in so selfish light ? ... At times ... even this rat race is mis-contrued and mis-represented ... you need to dive deeper ... to see what actually matters to you"

He seemed logical ... and of late - firm ...
And then I realized that ... Come What May ... I won't be able to come out of rat race so easily ... the decision to participate in rat race is actually solely driven by a sense of responsibility ... The responsibility of being a God to someone ... And not the fucking idol and texts and pilgrimages that people push onto fellow humans just to score a long-term-business-actually ...

But I made a pact with him ... I would talk to him ... and try to keep him alive ... if he dies, I would die too ...

So today - Just to soothe my animal ... I planned to make a laundry list of interactions that touches him :D ... I would be back ... ;-)

(Now ... Who am "I"? ... Ha ha ha ha ha ha) ... The self diffused like a thin smoke into air ... and I woke up ... only to find you staring at my blog and trying to make a sense of what kind of man I am ... Well, only suggestion - Don't try ;-)

1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iUZRSeqzz8
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Vcd9PDsdIs
3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eN5dP3BZALQ
4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sDJP49awOcg
5. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS-DkrZBdxA
6. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGMEx2bEyKM
7. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRxmgHdpXYA
8. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGpd1V8YYT0
9. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqQ6BF50AT4
10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjWuOtHGJck
11. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcKl4LzMzzs
12. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBw_JSiNF9c
13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnSNXzTXsF0
14. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bCAd59yH-o
15. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YzW1nMB9fk
16. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Ejga4kJUts
17. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwtdhWltSIg
18. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1TO48Cnl66w

... Now feeling sleepy (due to another night-out) as well as rejuvenated after such a dose of good music :-)

"We would run through those streets again"

---------
Rancho (with a coffee mug in his hand):
---------
He was on his regular task of mulling over ever-annoying stress buttons of Cash, Budgets and Audits ... All thanks to his career in Banking ... when all of a sudden, he was struck by an inescapable thought (as strong as a lightning I'd say) called "Heer".

And like a small boy watching through his kaleidoscope, he went into his past. He went back into those streets ... those dwelling in a peculiarly random city ... where he used to run around ... to gather some fun ... and may be some fuel for his brain.

Those streets were somehow nature's beckoning to his redemption. How ?
Well, it required a normal Indian to first put himself through a self-hypnosis and then an interview with vampire to understand what he did and how he did that.
Today, again, he wished (rather craved) to be in those streets.
Streets of salvation, streets of freedom, streets of childhood, streets of innocence.
It was like one of those dreams he used to frequently see during his school days wherein he used to encounter a sky akin to aurora in Chennai !!

----------
Heer (somehwere ... as confused as Rancho):
----------
Heer loved Rockstar. She told Rancho on phone that she liked it... She told Rancho, that it reminded her of him.
And Rockstars, as their name suggest, are stars. Far away...so far away that Heer kept getting confused that they were of no use to earth, humans and likewise / obviously, Heer.

But Heer also forgot one fact that even one single star was important for her entire galaxy to sustain the time's test. There was a stellar balance which that star enabled. And this star was not just another star ... Eh ?


------------
We:
------------
Wonder if Heer remembers today as to when and why did she cried for first time in front of her Rockstar. Star asked her. She replied that those were tears of happiness. Well, we can safely assume that the star slipped on those tears and fell in love, right at that very moment.
And the star watches earth ... till today. May be still awestruck by it's first gaze on Heer.
And till today, it hopes that it'll get a chance to run through those streets again ... with Heer.

Memoirs of a Sailor !! This time Russia

Been snowing all the day ... been on the snowy deck for too long ... wish to leave it all and take a break ...

The deck seems so beautiful ... Green and White ! Had it been heavy snow, we won't be seeing green at all ... Fresh epoxy paint we applied all the way while coming to this beautiful port of Novorossyisk ... ladies in steel all around ... the most beautiful ones are near the pier by the breakwater ...

While entering I was in forward station ... still a new recruit ... learning the ropes ... I remember dropping anchor ... the port one ... captain had ordered ... "let go port anchor" ... then after long silence ... I saw a tugboat approaching ... they were shouting something ... were they asking for heaving line ... nope ... cigaarettay commandante ... F U ... take the line up your ass cheeks and pull our ropes you bloody scoundrels ... that's what I heard next ... and then I remember myself running ... running from bits to bollards ... passing on the rope ... turning the winch wheels in the outward direction ... till the time ropes reached the pier ... they put it diligently around the staghorn ... heave ... heave ... and then I heard captain asking everyone to heave all tight and we are "all fast" ... yes we were ... who could be "slow" ... but now with rain water dripping from the edge of my helmet, I felt homesick ... Mummy ... Papa ... I miss you !

I remember cycling in rains when I was a kid ... especially near the giant open granite mine in Bharra Basti near my home in Bokaro ... it was an open pit mine ... they called it a quarry I think ... cycling all the way down like a helix around the periphery of the giant pit used to be sheer fun ... and then there was a green color lake in the crater formed out of the pit ... Atlas cycle ... yup ... this was my cycle ... those were the days ...

And then these are also days ... the way I miss those days of childhood that I spent in cycling around the green forests and overflowing rapid rivers in my small hometown ... must be the same way I'd miss these days that I spend on ships ... amen !! Can't take more of it ... Well ... Why? ... Let's think on that later dude ! ...

Chief calls me on walkie-talkie ... "Cadet, the pumping has stopped. There's a 3 day long strike in the port. We won't be doing any cargo operations for 3 days, all going well. So secure up everything and we stay all fast. Shut the manifold valve. Shut the drop valves too on your way back to CCR." 5 minutes hence I was in CCR.

"Cadet, you should push off now. It's been more than a day you have been awake. Take a break !"

"Sir, can I please go out in the evening sir ? With my mates ? It's been long since I last took a shore leave, Sir !"

"Okay, but what would you do outside ? It's been snowing ! You won't find anything open."

"We will see Sir. I just wish to take a break. Hope that's fine."

"Yes yes. That sounds "determined" ... I dare not stop you ... eh ? ... Go and have fun :-)"

(After 2 hours)

We 2 mates are walking down the gangway, almost running :-)
Few of the best moments onboard are the ones in which you're running out of the ship ... Trust me !
It's like ... you get "grounded" when you leap off the last step of the gangway and land on the wharf :-)

Snowing had got mild and it was the perfect moment for us to move out.
So, basking in complete joy, we headed for the tanker terminal's gate. It might have taken me around 15 mins to come in viewing range of the terminal security personnel who were guarding the gate. Showed our passports and shore passes, I specifically showed a cheshire smile (the one which we Indians tend to enact in front of unassuming white folks) and asked for permission to exit.

"This way please sir !" He stepped on the side and showed me the way to the gate. Woah ! That was fast :-)

My mate's name was Imtiaz Ali. He had been on ship for few less months than me and was almost same age.
And that's why we shared a very good rapport with each other. Fortunately, this was the first shore leave where we were going out together.
We took a cab from terminal's gate and asked him to drop us at the nearest cyber cafe.

Bullett Raja: Movie Review

"Braahman bhookha toh Sudama, samjha toh Chanakya aur rootha toh ... Raavan !"
"Shahar mein aayenge toh garmi thodi badh jaayegi..." ... Wow !!

These dialogues struck a very strong note in my mind when I saw this movie's trailers for the first time.
Out of 4 P's, the promotion has obviously been very good for this movie ;-)

(Obviously I chose it over the "R..Rajkumar" ... mujh jaise gande bande ko aur kitni gandi baat sikhayenge :D )

Plot: A struggling unemployed (and seeking one!) amateur outlaw Raja Missra (Saif) crashes into a wedding uninvited where he meets Rudra (Jimmy). 4 Hours and 4 pegs brings them so close that Raja jumps into a gun-gang fight to save Rudra and his side of kins. A bond gets sealed and the daring-duo "Raja-Rudra" forms up which teams up with the strongest king-maker Ram-Babu Shukla (Raj Babbar) and then on instrcutions of Shukla ji, they both go onto kill all the ill-intented enemies. But in this spree, they step on the tail of a rich industrialist named Bajaj (Gulshan Grover) and simultaneously bump into the over-fed Bong-babe Mitali (Sonakshi) who charms her way into Raja's heart.
All seems to be going great till Bajaj reappears with a contract killer Sumer Yadav (Ravi Kissen) to tick off Rudra from his hit-list. Raja vows revenge and kills Bajaj. In comes ACP Arun Singh (Vidyut Jamwal - "Force" fame) to counter and kill Raja...Rest is for you to discover, if you plan to.
Seems typical UP-Bihar meets Bollywood masala movie. And that's what it is.

Strengths: Jimmy Shergill, Saif, Vidyut, Action, Dialogues, Happy-Climax.

The 3 main young turks - Jimmy, Saif and Vidyut rock the screen whenever they are on it. Action is power packed and looks realistic. Dialogues are the main attraction. Special credit to the one which Saif smirks and says to an all pumped up Vidyut who is following him up "Tum kaun ho bey ? Dekh rahe haine tab se ... bahut excited ho ??"

Weaknesses: Sonakshi, Songs, Raja and Rudra doing some monkey antics in a song to decimate opposition parties' political rallies, bad-timing and irrelevance of some dialogues, hackneyed story line in 1st half.

Sonakshi seriously needs to go Bipasha (read size zero) way else she'll be soon turning into a typical Rakhi/Meena Kumari/Nirupa Roy kind of actress. Songs in the movie are more of a desperate attempt to look like a UP Bihar inspired chutney but they disengage from intent of movie on whole. I opine that best UP Bihar songs, shown recently, were in fact made by a Marathi babe - Sneha Khanvilkar (Gangs of Wasseypur). Wonder why Tigmanhsu didn't take her in this one ? Sajid Wajid suck, period.

Overall, the movie has a confused plot in 1st half, goes onto gain some strength in 2nd half. Climax is good. Actors are fine. Story is simple one.

You can watch it max once if you can tolerate an over-dose of ego-clashes of people who don't think twice before shooting from their hip :D

Rating-2.5*

Shuddh Desi Romance: Movie Review

Shuddh Desi Ghee , Shuddh Desi Achaar, Shuddh Desi Kudi ... sab suna tha ... But Shuddh Desi Romance ?

Well, only in movie teasers splattered on channels recently ... No Shuddh, No Desi, hmm...Thoda Romance ...

Plot/Story: A fake-barati cum clothes sales-man in Jaipur by name - Raghuram Sitaram (Shushant) meets another fake-barati cum ex-student - Gaitri (Parineeti) while going in a bus full of baratis for his own shaadi. They start up a conversation in the bus at night which ends up in an abrupt incomplete kiss. Next morning, Raghu runs away from his own marriage leaving the dulhan - Tara (debutante-Vani Kapoor) asking for a cold drink to bring her back to senses :-)
Next we see Raghu meeting up, flirting, courting and then mating with Gaitri as live-in partners.
They seem to be actually finally madly in love with each other .... Phew !! And They plan shaadi too.
But....This time the girl runs away !
Enter Tara.
Raghu falls for Tara.
Mind you, Tara is the same girl whom he had earlier abandoned right at marriage-hall-garland-stage. But subah ka bhoola, shaam ko ghar aa gaya hai ! Even they have kissed, made up, and made love.
Now audience (especially all wives and girlfriends holding their men by neck) starts feeling - Oh so finally the movie's coming to a happy ending !
Well No... ;-)
Re-Enter Gaitri. Raghu gets confused, falls for Gaitri again. Kisses Gaitri. Mistake, Kiss happened in front of Tara !
Next what ? Well ... It has just started ;-)


Go Watch the movie ... FYI-suspense is not worth it :-)

Weaknesses:
1. Theme: In purusit of being different and modern, this movie has proposed a kind of question mark on the very institution of shaadi. This is too bold a theme for Indian mindset. Tier-2 cities' audience won't be able to relate to the story or charachters. Bad for movie's commerce certainly.

Stregths:
1. All lead actors with special mention for debutante Vani. Confidence personified. And Not to forget our great entertainer - Rishi Kapoor (Without him, this movie couldn't go beyond even half-time)
2. Jaipur's picturization through camera
3. Some songs

As told earlier, this movie is a bold question mark on those who claim that a true-love is supposed to culminate in a shaadi. Whether this question is right or wrong one to ask, I can't comment. But certainly, this movie would be hated by many as it would irk their basic belief on Indian middle-class family values.
Should do extremely well with young student crowd (especially in Metros) as this movie entirely belongs to open-minded people who can discuss social issues within like-minded peers with maturity ...Marketing it on TV shows and all is waste as the best medium for promotion for these kind of movies is - word of mouth ...

My Ratings: 3*

Random thoughts of a cluttered mind :-)

The meandering paths ... went on to meet one day ... Twists and turns leading to few charachters ... Few friends ... from college may be ... second year ... yeah !! Where do they go ... ? Jungle ... Hmm ...No !! Someplace else ... A historical cave ... ? Hmm ... banal concept dude ! Ok ... think ... may be a cave in a jungle ... over smart ... ok ... leave it ... lets make some nice related and relevant point ... ok ... can they be onto a trip to a mountain ... hmm ... sounds interesting ... like "kilte hain gul yahan ..." ? .... Yeah ! .... Avalanche ... love ... trekking ... ghost ... yeti (may be) ... lost ... survivors ... murders (too filmy dude :-) ) ... let it be dude ! ... one by one ... psycho killer ... unknown ... old temple known to resurrect dead ... some weird god inside ... no priest ... just a shadow that lingers from daytime to evening due to sunlight ... guides the lost souls to a safe haven nearby in a cave ... you seem to be fixated by a cave dude !! ... Hmm ... so the cave can save till the next storm ... can't wait ... need to find food ... sleep ... cuddle up to your heart ... puppy love turns sensuous and then real hot session ... dreaming ... feeling a ghost in the cave ... asking to vacate it ... woke up ... the abominable guy ... really ??? Yeah ... no joke dude ... !! He he he he ... cook cook ... cook more ... so now what ? The guy looks like a long lost normal guy ... lost in his own byzantine life that he spent with civilization ... talks about world ... his family ... his friends ... and then something sparks up ... but a different sound diverts their attention ... snow ... through dark misty night comes a sound of a roaring river ... add visual touch ... they need to run ... but the guy asks them for something else ... a new place ... different from what they know till now ... treasure hunt angle ? Need research if that's a good angle ... but do connect him to survivors' past ... various directions from here ... you need to have a message ... look for a survey or data churning exercise for finding the best fit of events and flow ... it's withering away dude !! ... Yeah ... let's keep the focus ... You know very well how to make sense of this serpentine flow that you go through ... we all go through it dude ... few actually take up the task to make sense out of it ... that's why they are few ... :-) Challaa Taani !!

Lootera: Movie Review

Romance is in river, in snow, in trees and in air ! Just watched "Lootera" ... :)

Plot:
A slow paced light coloured romance between a fiesty rich landlords's daughter and a scheming shrewd "Lootera" which goes ahead to become a real heart-wrenching story of sacrifice and unconditional love.

Story:
Pakhi (Sonakshi) is daughter of a rich zamindar in Manikpur (WB). In comes a young handsome and well-behaved government archaeologist Varun (Ranveer) from state's archaeological department along with a request to excavate a particular plot of land in zamindar's estate where they claimed, lied some pre-historic remains. Zamindar allows Varun to start excavation work and also invites him to stay in his haveli till the time excavation gets completed. During this boring excavation activity, love was going to blossom ... Pakhi comes close to Varun and eventually both of them fall in head-over-heels for each other. Our honest and committed Varun proposes to zamindar to allow both of them to get married. Quite surprisingly zamindar  agrees to his proposal and movie seems to be ending right at interval. But this was not going to happen. Suspense element, right ? Enjoy it.
But after interval movie takes a different turn. Rather more mature and calm turn. First the setting shifts to Dulhousie and no more West Bengal. A general slow pace kicks in (exception being few sequences of thrilling chor-police chase) and movie moves into an intensely emotional realm. The intensity would pull you into their world and take you blind-folded wondering up to the climax. Sadly but peculiar taste of this movie's climax is actually common-place now and it seems it's the new in-thing in bollywood ... You would shout at the screen ... Why ??

Weaknesses:
For certain viewers, either the slow pace of movie, or the intense drama or the 1950's kind of romance can get dangerously boring. And viewers might exclaim - "Kya pakaau film thi yaar"... Not a mass entertainer for sure. May affect the business also :(

Strengths:
1. Story (Decision to adapt part of the movie from "The last leaf" was masterpiece ! O Henry Sir is a killer, anyday),
2. Ranveer (After diagonally opposite charachters in dhinchak roles like Band-B-B and Ladies Vs Ricky, this role gives him a chance to show his breadth of acting skills),
3. Sonakshi (for 1st time, I felt proud of her),
4. Direction
5. Cinematography / Background Scenes (The Johars and Chopras should learn that nice locations and backgrounds can be possible within India too)
6. Music (Rightly placed songs/tunes which add to the intensity. 10 on 10 to the background music for sure !!)

A must watch for romantic-at-heart people who can endlessly love to stare at the beauty of slow silent ripples in water.
A strict no-no for people looking for a weekend stress-buster ;-)

Stars: 4*

Chalaa Taani !
Neo.

Ghanchakkar: Movie Review

Sun Oye Ghanchakkar Babu, tere chakkar hain bekaabu, hua bheja tal ke sabu .....dana rey !!

Plot: A typical bank robbery goes into "Ghazni" mode which threatens to be taking shape of "The Usual Suspects" or "Johnny Gaddar" but dupes everyone by ending up in a brilliant question mark and that's signature saved "Ghanchakkar" ... Yes :-)

Screenplay: A slow pace session which ends up in strange yet orgasmic climax. Don't miss the climax if you ever start experiencing the foreplay :P

Dialogues: Good to start ... but very soon they get hackneyed.

Story: Sanjay (Emraan), an expert Lock-Picker, is married to fiery, fashion freak and loud-dressed punjaban Neetu (Vidya) and is leading a languid lazy metro life till he gets a call from Pandit (Rajesh Sharma) and Idris (Namit Das) to rob a bank. Fun kicks in here. Nice bank robbery sequence ensues. Post robbery the trio decide that they would divide the money after 3 months so as to let the post-robbery-police-heat settle down. Flash-forward -> Sanjay refuses to even recognise Pandit and Idris after 3 months claiming he met an accident that has caused an (Ghazni re-incarnate !) amnesia which would aggravate with time. He also claims that he doesn't know where he had kept the loot-money. Annoyed by this Pandit and Idris forcibly enter into Sanjay's home and give 7 day's ultimatum to remember everything and return back the entire loot. Fun takes a back seat and buffalo enters water here. To keep the interest in movie, the scriptwriter keeps pushing age-old or hollywood-movies-inspired-sequences including pouring in some "Bhediya Aaya , Bhediya Aaya" sequences and plunging the neck-line of Vidya's dresses. Both, in fact, would turn futile in front of a discerning audience. 

Movie goes straight into climax with hints of "Judas Kissing" at times. 

And, wo wo wo ... what a climax ... Loved It !! We, the audience, clapped and thanked Emraan for keeping the things small within a banana and a fork to tackle the last samurai :P 

Strengths: Climax, Ghanchakkar song, sequences like the bank robbery and "Ye fried rice hai ??"

Weaknesses: Slow pace in middle, length of movie, banal talks, Vidya Balan (why did she ever sign this movie??)

One time watchable.

Even though not rated an adult movie, avoid impressionable-aged-kids with you ... Vidya aunty is still in hangover of her "Dirty Picture" it seems ;-)

Stars: 3* (Don't ask for more !!)

Ranjhana: Movie Review

Some people love watching cricket or TV serials. It's like an addiction for many. But then there are people like me who are addicted to movies. Watching a real good movie and writing about it is one of the best pleasures I look forward to enjoy in life.

At times there are movies which can't be categorized as good or bad but they leave some strong impact on you. Something in them makes your pulse race faster than itself every next second. And then something in them makes your heart go for a toss and at the end it leaves a void, a small ache in your heart. 

Ranjhana is one such movie. 

Plot is set in two cities i.e. Banaras and Delhi. 

There's an average looking but super confident Kundan (Dhanush) who is son of a tamizh priest in Banaras. He falls in love with a local muslim girl, Zoya (Sonam) and falls real deep. In fact his love gets reciprocated through real dramatic-small-town-school-days'-wala love affair within 20 minutes from start of the movie. He got slapped numerous times, he cuts his wrist veins, jumps into auto, cycles on railway platform ... with his looks and actions, surprisingly, his love looks real ... this would indeed be a difficult feat for any six-pack-abs hero in bollywood ... But sadly, post this beautiful start, the movie takes various twists and turns. Countless twists. Movie moves ahead into real-life-problems ... In parallel, the love traverses it's journey through years...long years. If you see, the Ranjhana love starts with a line-segment, turns into a triangle, then a quadrilateral, then again a triangle and then again a line-segment. You keep getting colors of politics, murders, social-movements in the background too. Incidentally the Love-line-segment at the start and climax of the movie has same two end points but these two end points are real extreme and crazy souls. 

Let me not tell you entire story for two simple reasons: a. It'd kill the fun; b. It'd be difficult to narrate

Strengths: Dhanush, Sonam, Dialogues, Swara Bhaskar (Tanu weds Manu fame), Zeeshan Ayyub (No one killed Jessica, Jannat-2 and Mere Bro ki dulhan fame) , AR Rahman's Music.  

Weaknesses: the way story moves into weird unnecessary twists and for the climax. 

Abhay Deol is an over-kill. Director should not have hired a pro like him for a small role like this one. 

Must watch for small-town-guys-once-been-obsessive-impulsive-one-sided-lovers-during-school-fraternity ..... !! Yours truly couldn't have missed it ;-)

Stars: 3.5*

Another day in the Rat Race.

For Stinky Rats: If you succeed in cheating someone,dont think that the person was a fool but realize that they trusted you more than you desereved.

For my friends: There's no free lunch. And if you are eating one, you are the customer. Period.

Yeah !! Don't get surprised. Neo can be real blunt at times. But this post is going to be all qabalistic to trick and avoid the search engines as I don't wish to kill some zombies.

Here it goes !!

It was one of the most weird Saturdays in my life recently. Literally went into a temporary remorse.
Felt too sad for some people whom I met. I even met myself, yet again, in the mirror, after meeting them.
Life is so bloody complex at times. We could imgaine at this very moment, we could have full control of of our life and then the very next moment you would not even feel like taking the next breath.

Met some zombies actually, to be precise, as you must have felt at the onset.
They wanted me to join their zombie land full of false aspirations and false commitments of legal methods of suicide. Actually, I could see through their so called "charismatic" stupidity.
People can sometimes get so foolish just to gain quick money that they actually end up loosing it or a part of it.

I could relate them to the person that I used to be a few years ago. The utter chaos that was !!
Lost my right leg in those chaotic times. Though I have regenerated a new one in last few years but still the old wound hurts and till today I walk with excruciating pain.
Man !!

Sometimes I tend to counter my own conviction. Predictable me !!
Am I going in right direction ? Does this path lead to the place where I used to dream of ?
Or we all are the oblivious inhabitants of this murky zombie-land where even I am one of them ambling ahead with a snarling and blood dripping mouth ready to devour on first soul I meet ?

The Rat Race !! At it's best. What else ?

Sometimes we just are so much ready to jump a bungee that we forget to check the harness and tackle if it's gonna sustain the strain. What next ? You expect some miracle ? Ok. Let's do maths. Maths as to: If your body from this height fall into cliff without any tail attached anywhere, then how many pieces your body would be finally broken into ? Assume g=9.8 m /s^2 and height=100m.

Agreed, Analysis Analysis Analysis ... Paralysis !!
But with zero analysis how far you could go?
You challenging common sense ?

Why sometimes people tend to forget common sense ? Just because forgetting it would bring them a notional pleasure ? But what if this "dream" or so called "orgasm" never ends ?
May be it would end up all your bridges to safety and security ..... won't it?

So much so for so called "quick bucks" ??

All the best to zombies. I don't belong to their land. Never.
Puked the bile out of my tummy. Now feeling better.

Ciao, Bona Notte !!

Neo.